Sometimes you are confronted with your own blaring ignorance and are even forgiven. That’s what happened when I had lunch at Bistro 9 just one year ago. The Mediterranean inspired menu intrigued me; a lamb, chicken or salmon skewer, a side of tabouli, hummus or even macaroni and cheese.

My waiter Antonio asked if I had any questions about the menu and here’s what I asked.

“Is the macaroni and cheese as good as at your family reunions?”

His warm brown eyes looked at me with patience and a kindness usually reserved for children.

“I’m from the Cape Verde Islands. We didn’t have macaroni and cheese.”

And I wanted to die or at least disappear and I can’t remember if I followed my ignorance with a lame attempt at a back peddle, but I stayed and began to learn who this lovely man was, where he came from and his rich textured culture.

On a subsequent visit I tell Antonio,that I bought an IPod and have a Cesaria Evora song on my playlist.

“Embarcacao. I don’t know exactly what she sings about, but I think it’s about love and time and she makes me sway.”

Antonio tells me a little about the music of the Cape Verde Islands.

“Cape Verde music is a mixture of Spanish, Portuguese and all of West Africa, Morocco down to Angola.”

Antonio loves to sing and he offers to make me a CD of various Cape Verde musicians.

Antonio Teixeira, (Ta-shay-da) is the ninth of twelve children. As the oldest of eight, this piques my curiosity. We agree that sharing comes with the territory and having your own book, toy, room or shirt was not a possibility and yet we know those experiences shaped who we became and the way we view the world.

At twelve, Antonio’s world changed dramatically. His parents divorced and his mother, Maria and brothers and sisters immigrated one by one to Brockton, Massachusetts, thirty miles south of Boston, where there is a large Cape Verdean community. Maria, a former flight attendant who had travelled from Cape Verde to Africa and Europe, now travelled to a factory and labored as a machine operator to support her family.

I’m curious about the culture shock inherent with leaving the tropical island off the West Coast of Africa with its mixture of African and Portuguese roots and arriving in the United States.

“I had to adjust to four seasons, rather than two and I had to learn English.”

Antonio speaks mellifluous English, Cape Verdean Creole which is used colloquially, Portuguese, the official language and Spanish, which he learned from his grandmother.

That first summer in the United States, Antonio fell off his first bicycle, broke his wrist and had a big black eye.

“I couldn’t wait to get back on my bike. I just got it, it was one week old. It was my sister’s graduation from high school and I was in the hospital for three days.”

Today he travels the city on his bicycle without broken wrists or black eyes, sometimes just a flat tire which he repairs with tools he keeps in his backpack. "It's more than transportation."

His mother remains in Brockton and is raising her eight year old grandson. Her seven daughters and four sons are all on the East Coast. Her son Ildo lives in Senegal and Antonio lives here in San Francisco.

Like most Cape Verdeans, Antonio was raised Catholic and on this day he is pensive and says,

“I try to find God in my own little way.”

He often attends Glide Memorial Church.

"They welcome everyone.”

We recognize the aspects we still hold in our hearts of Catholicism: prayer, faith, ritual.

He is gentle when he says,

“You have to believe in something.”

At twenty-one, Antonio knew the climate of San Francisco would suit his warm blood. His first job waiting tables was at Sparky’s Diner where customers provided spontaneous live theatre while he worked late into the night and early morning.

Antonio explores his artistic nature by sculpting in his backyard.

“I mostly do abstracts of human heads. I work in alabaster stone. I’m pretty good at seeing faces in every rock and chisel it out.”

He is also an avid gardener.

“It’s one of my favorite things to do. I have a fig tree, avocado tree, an orange and lemon tree, squash and herbs.”

He also loves to cook particularly seafood prepared with Cape Verdean flavors.

“I was one of the only kid’s my mother let into the kitchen to cook with her.”

Here’s one of Antonio’s favorite recipes.

Baked Portuguese Fish

2 lbs fresh tuna

2 large onions, chopped

2 stalks celery, chopped

2 tomatoes, chopped

¼ cup of butter

½ cup of tomato juice

2 tablespoons lemon juice

4 cloves crushed garlic

1 bay leaf

Sauté onions, celery and tomatoes until tender.

Add all juices, garlic and bay leaf. Cook for 3 minutes over medium heat.

Place fillets in greased baking dish.

Pour the sauce over the fish.

Bake at 350 degrees for about 20 minutes, until fish is done.

And in his native tongue I give thanks to Antonio.

Muito Obrigada.

NEXT WEEK: I’LL INTRODUCE YOU TO MY OPTOMETRIST/ DR. KURTBAY